time

My boys have gone off with a freind to the Steiner Kinder fair, leaving me here in bed to have a morning 's recouperation. I'm listening to this which I found through Amanda. Sigor Ros' music is so sweeping and emotive and otherworldly and has the same effect on me as the Cocteau Twins did throughout the 80's and 90's (and still now) - lifts me up into the ethers and bouyantly carries me to other realms....wonderful. This particular clip always has me in tears by the end - you will see what I mean. They capture the joy and the wonder and the fearlessness of childhood.
I just got off the phone talking with a very dear friend who is currently living a gypsy life of sorts, travelling around with his caravan, meditating, and about to head to India for the first time. He has all his time to himself as one does when one has no partner or family, and i always love hearing about his travels and his discoveries within and without. He has had an enormous year - a death, the breakdown of a realtionship, the emergence of personal demons.....Where am I going with this? I think because I have a day to myself I'm reflecting that time for self, brief though it is, as being precious and necessary. We have such big change upon us and the potential for a completely different life. We could buy a van and travel around the country. We could buy tickets to Europe and go and see Rinpoche next year. We could move to a different state and live in the country. I haven't really had time to contemplate it all, whcih is in some ways a good thing because it helps to focus on what needs to be done now, but I'm finding today, a sense of excitement as to what might be in store. I would like to leave my job and go back to a more creative way of generating income. A few years ago I had a small business recycling and dyeing children's clothing. Lately I've been having visions of rebirthing it and working from home again; especially as we are planning to have another baby. If we really are to homeschool, then we need to consider how we survive financially in a way that gives us time at home.

OUr beautiful boy. What a huge leap from two to three! The emergence of imaginative play and the ability to have a conversation; the joy he experiences now at being with other children and how far we've come from Days of Chucky (biting). Beau absolutely loves dresses. The more colourful and eloborate the better. His favourite is a little green 'fairy dress' that he must sleep in, dance in, and very pedantically cross the threshold from porch to entry hall in. He also loves shoes. Will do anything to try on a pair of shoes. I love it. I want to go out and gather the biggest dress up collection I possibly can. Boas, hats, tutus, jackets, masks.....and some for Beau too ;D