Bare and achin' Bones

Such a perfect Melbourne Spring afternoon I should be out fluffing in the garden and I may well do so after I post this. I'm in post-osteopathic treatment la la land wherein some long abiding aches and pains are starting to ease away - quite lovely. My boys are sleeping - big one has flu, little one worn out after a lovely play with a sweet friend. I'm feeling somewhat blue as events of our life in the last year have come to a point where we may have to sell our little house and start afresh. There are two sides to this coin obviously. On the shiny happy side we will come away from this place debt free with the possibility of buying a little place in the country and simplifying our life style greatly. On the other side I am sad to think that what we have created here and what is possible here will end . When I put the words down, and read them back really the benefits far out way any losses but I guess it's just that sense of home and community that I finally am starting to feel here that I will miss even though I know us to be perfectly capable of establishing these things elsewhere. There's nothing like being on the verge of leaving something to make you realise how much you appreciate it! Somewhere in it all is the allure of the Australian Dream and when I go into that and really think about it I do sense a change for the better. We really have been struggling this year sometimes even for food and for what? To carve ourselves a piece of suburban life that is increasingly more challenging to sustain. The cost of living keeps increasing, as do interest rates and we all seem to be getting ourselves further into debt to keep up or looking down the barrel of working hours that completely wipe out any family-centred life.
I am staying open to the belief that anything can happen and that if we are prepared to do whatever is necessary and without fretting we will be present enough to see opportunities coming our way - maybe new jobs that allow us flexibility and pay us well and keep us fed creatively, support from places we never thought of, the perfect piece of advice, a block of land in the country that meets all our self-sufficiency requirements and the friends to retreat there with....Whether we stay here or go There it will be because all conditions were right.

But still I'm going to let myself be a little sad and go and sit out back and day dream about where we would put a chook run and a sand pit . And maybe eat that block of Black and Gold Mayan orange chocolate that I've been resisting because apparently sugar can revert a newly adjusted skeleton back to scrambled state. Maybe just one piece.....or two.

The Rain Cometh the Flu Leaveth

Suburban Centre for Dust Collection and High Density Traffic (above) or World's Smallest Bathroom. Where in fact is the bath? Behind door #1. Door #2 leads to back yard. Of course, how logical. Two doors are very necessary in World's Smallest Bathroom so that when you are feeling COMPLETELY CLAUSTROPHOBIC YOU CAN GET THE **** OUT OF THERE....
Gone are the days of luxury bathing and obviously not just because of the water problem.
I'm a DIY renovator wannabe but plumbing isn't my area.

Oh bring it on bring it on bring it ON!!! That rain is possibly the best sound I could imagine. Except the part that reminds me that litres of precious water are splashing from an area of gutter overhead.....

Recovering from the worst dose of flu I've experience for a great ,many years. Only two whole days in bed but should really have been three or four (and the whole thing has spent weeks incubating within me via throat tickles, headaches and, fatigue) so here I am with a decent cough, and the hope that it hibernates tomorrow night during choir during which I will conduct not sing and hopefully not be reduced to the likes of an air traffic controller......

Hope your Veges are singing out there in the wet earth.

And to all of you who have been struck by the flu of late I comiserate! I sit in bed with lap top (thanks Martino for I am now saved from a day of total boredom!) and sun streaming in to bedroom and all is quiet. I don't think I have been this sick for a long time. Do you agree that sometimes as a mother one simply refuses to fall ill because someone has to keep It All together? K is wonderful though he has missed out on the cleaning gene so if I venture out there into the rest of the house I am faced with days of mess. So I will sit here in the boudoire and hide and hope that at some point in the day the mess will disappear. I'm only a very tiny bit analy retentive about cleanliness when it's particularly warm or I am ill.

Beau and K are off on a Ceres adventure. Precious boy time giving me precious me time. I would rather be out in the sun with them but this here is rare. We were to have a garage sale today but will wait until next week. Time for a good ol' spring clean. Time to pull up the last of the blue (yesss) carpet and go forth and buy mulch and seedlings. Time to fill up the sand pit and plant nasturtium seeds, to air the dynes and try making bread again (first attempt failed due to lack of warmth for rising).

May all your winter lurgies be long behind you and may spring find you light and energetic and full of creativity.

Way Way Way Past Bedtime

Just trying to cram yet another thing in before resting this weary body. K came home with library books about home schooling today. So parallel with my own feelings about education and family life and so inspiring in general they are that I read almost two of them by the fire this evening. They have successfully dispelled any concerns for me regarding time and energy restraints by pointing out that homeschooling , especially on an informal level takes much less time up of a day because of the intensive nature of one on one education; because 'lessons' are integrated into daily life and the daily routine and because the child can learn at his/her own pace, in blocks if they wish...AND as a parent one gets to learn things alongside one's children therefore eliminating another of my queries as to how much stuff do K and I have to know before we embark on this journey?? I feel excited and inspired as if (and as I suppose I actually have) finally discovered my true vocation. I feel passionate and energised and admittedly a little daunted by what may potentially be a barrage of questions and confrontation from a large sector of the community and possible even close friends (for I have detected a hint already during brief conversations with people on the subject). As with all areas of parenting it can be so confronting (in my own experience) when someone chooses to do something very differently from ourselves and from the mainstream because we are forced to question our own decisions and motivations. Which surely is a good thing. Lately I just feel more than ever that almost everything we do in the world we do with little to no questioning. Social, economic and political habits and requirements and expectations become the norm and because we see most people around us doing the same things we carry on trying to keep up. I do not suppose to have the all the answers or a better way of living, I think what has happened for K and I is that three aspects of our life have steered us further toward alternative ways of living - financial difficulty (which was partly the impetus for us giving up the car, and for exploring alternative ways of surviving and socialising); Beau's now thankfully infrequent biting which had us look more deeply into our parenting and our unconscious attitudes around control and freedom and staying true our most heart felt intentions; and underlying all of it our ongoing inner inquiry and observation and attempts to integrate (until someone discovers that the only obstacle to enlightenment is a mineral deficiency...) God/Buddha/ All That Is/ The State of Pure Presence or whatever you may choose to call It, with the activities of daily life. (hmm no wonder we are tired.) And we suspect that maybe just maybe there are other ways to do this Human Being in The World thing that are more simple, more relaxed, more embracing of others' needs, more sustainable and more fun and require a lot less funds.
If you have the answers don't hesitate to illustrate them in clear point form and don't skimp on pictures - we must have proof!
PS Happy Spring everyone Yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!! Apparently our computer doesn't realise we've moved on from winter. It's SO An Hour and a Half Ago!